28 January 2010

a view of the sea

i'm sitting in a little cafe, cleverly dubbed holy grounds, writing this today. and the sky is that sort of pale grey that frustrates me, offering neither storm nor warmth. so i'm posting some pictures of what my view was a week ago, in mexico, looking at the ocean and the sky...

delicious (i particularly love the gull):



love,
j

27 January 2010

kisses are a better fate

(than wisdom).


but, oh, new york public library, you're a pretty delicious fate too... (i love how all the books smell).

love,
j

25 January 2010

just practicing

a quick post today... one of my favorite things about meh-hee-co was that everyone and their mother asked us if we were honeymooning, and when we said no, the response was the same every time:

"ohhh, just practicing!"

i love it.

so real quick, a beautiful moment of sun and warmth and waves and shrimp and cheese and love and sand between our toes:


more soon.
love,
j

16 January 2010

tick-tock

by 11 hours, what my sleep head meant was 23... but it's coming up close.

i wish i had this to help me count down the minutes:


love,
j

in 11 hours

i will be on a plane headed here.


puerto vallarta.
thank goodness. i really need a vacation.

back friday with lots of beautiful things, pictures, ideas...

tons of love,
j

13 January 2010

bisous, besalu!

since it'll be a bit before i'm able to open my own bakery, i have to seek out small, kindred spirit cafes to scratch my itch. and, without a doubt, cafe besalu (in ballard) wins as the most wonderful creators of pastries in the city.

still on south beach, i just can't partake. and it's a shame, because baking is really one of the things i love best. as is eating things i bake. but they're hiring a baker's assistant, and they remind me of that lovely little shop i've yet to open, and so i went in, and dropped off my resume, and chatted with the pastry chef, and then walked wistfully away, without so much as a nibble of chocolate croissant.

this is what you can expect from besalu:


divine. perfectly crisp, flaky dough with soft and moist insides, and the most delicious and fresh fruit you could imagine. i can't wait to return to you, butter!

love,
j

12 January 2010

i've got a string wrapped around my finger...

i've been a bit absent from my daily exercise in finding joy and beauty in the world around me... not that i've not found it, it's just been a bit of a whirlwind of family visits and work and accidents and setting up job interviews and scg meetings that i've hardly had a minute to sit down and post these beautiful things!

anyway, i'm going to do a good job of remembering, at least until saturday when i leave for puerto vallarta, after which i'm positive i'll have a bevy of beautiful things to share.

so today, i have sort of a hodgepodge. a smorgasbord. a geocache of sorts! take what you will.

first, i have my favorite music video from feist. because who doesn't love flying toast? it won't let me embed it, so instead i'm simply going to post the link.

second, a great photograph of my old hood, ballard, by jeff burgess. i love the boats and the colors and the tin can.


and third, speaking of tin cans, sunflower sutra, one of my favorite poems, and certainly some of my favorite ginsberg:

I walked on the banks of the tincan banana dock and
sat down under the huge shade of a Southern
Pacific locomotive to look at the sunset over the
box house hills and cry.
Jack Kerouac sat beside me on a busted rusty iron
pole, companion, we thought the same thoughts
of the soul, bleak and blue and sad-eyed,
surrounded by the gnarled steel roots of trees of
machinery.
The oily water on the river mirrored the red sky, sun
sank on top of final Frisco peaks, no fish in that
stream, no hermit in those mounts, just ourselves
rheumy-eyed and hungover like old bums
on the riverbank, tired and wily.
Look at the Sunflower, he said, there was a dead gray
shadow against the sky, big as a man, sitting
dry on top of a pile of ancient sawdust--
--I rushed up enchanted--it was my first sunflower,
memories of Blake--my visions--Harlem
and Hells of the Eastern rivers, bridges clanking Joes
Greasy Sandwiches, dead baby carriages, black
treadless tires forgotten and unretreaded, the
poem of the riverbank, condoms & pots, steel
knives, nothing stainless, only the dank muck
and the razor-sharp artifacts passing into the
past--
and the gray Sunflower poised against the sunset,
crackly bleak and dusty with the smut and smog
and smoke of olden locomotives in its eye--
corolla of bleary spikes pushed down and broken like
a battered crown, seeds fallen out of its face,
soon-to-be-toothless mouth of sunny air, sunrays
obliterated on its hairy head like a dried
wire spiderweb,
leaves stuck out like arms out of the stem, gestures
from the sawdust root, broke pieces of plaster
fallen out of the black twigs, a dead fly in its ear,
Unholy battered old thing you were, my sunflower O
my soul, I loved you then!
The grime was no man's grime but death and human
locomotives,
all that dress of dust, that veil of darkened railroad
skin, that smog of cheek, that eyelid of black
mis'ry, that sooty hand or phallus or protuberance
of artificial worse-than-dirt--industrial--
modern--all that civilization spotting your
crazy golden crown--
and those blear thoughts of death and dusty loveless
eyes and ends and withered roots below, in the
home-pile of sand and sawdust, rubber dollar
bills, skin of machinery, the guts and innards
of the weeping coughing car, the empty lonely
tincans with their rusty tongues alack, what
more could I name, the smoked ashes of some
cock cigar, the cunts of wheelbarrows and the
milky breasts of cars, wornout asses out of chairs
& sphincters of dynamos--all these
entangled in your mummied roots--and you there
standing before me in the sunset, all your glory
in your form!
A perfect beauty of a sunflower! a perfect excellent
lovely sunflower existence! a sweet natural eye
to the new hip moon, woke up alive and excited
grasping in the sunset shadow sunrise golden
monthly breeze!
How many flies buzzed round you innocent of your
grime, while you cursed the heavens of the
railroad and your flower soul?
Poor dead flower? when did you forget you were a
flower? when did you look at your skin and
decide you were an impotent dirty old locomotive?
the ghost of a locomotive? the specter and
shade of a once powerful mad American locomotive?
You were never no locomotive, Sunflower, you were a
sunflower!
And you Locomotive, you are a locomotive, forget me
not!
So I grabbed up the skeleton thick sunflower and stuck
it at my side like a scepter,
and deliver my sermon to my soul, and Jack's soul
too, and anyone who'll listen,
--We're not our skin of grime, we're not our dread
bleak dusty imageless locomotive, we're all
beautiful golden sunflowers inside, we're blessed
by our own seed & golden hairy naked
accomplishment-bodies growing into mad black
formal sunflowers in the sunset, spied on by our
eyes under the shadow of the mad locomotive
riverbank sunset Frisco hilly tincan evening
sitdown vision.

that's all, folks.
love,
j

10 January 2010

carkeek treasure chest

i came home yesterday from olympia feeling a little blue. nothing cheers me up like being by the water and a little tlc, so we grabbed the gps and went on a bit of a geocaching treasure hunt and hike down at carkeek park.



found it!


(my favorite was the cassette tape of german phrases, but jacob proudly selected a pedometer).


feeling a milllllllion times better, i returned to the city and work a little brighter-eyed and bushier-tailed. i love that in an age of lightning-fast technology and total social disconnect, you can get out into the dirt and leaves by the ocean and search for treasure! what an excellent adventure.

love,
j

07 January 2010

my grandfather's hat

found it at my grandmother's today, and adopted it.


i love the feathers.

love,
j

06 January 2010

george banton's holiday lights

i know christmas is over, but it has to have one last hurrah because i saw something so lovely last night i just had to post it.

every night on my way home from work, across the reservoir you can see a bunch of lights. we realized last night they'll probably be taken down soon, so we decided to try to find the house and check it out.

"this is exactly what my house is going to look like when i'm a real grownup."

oh my goodness. at the entrance was a sign welcoming you to turn off your car, and take a stroll through the yard. a little notice let us know that donations would be going to the Heart Association (nice work!) and that the light show hopefully, "brightens up an otherwise dark time of year." i think i love george banton.


the best part was all the detail. there were little santa lights staked into the ground, and cow lights (i think this is what really wooed me, what fantastic little lights!), along with a plethora of other animals.



there was his sweet and thoughtful notice, next to an old fashioned trash can used to hold the donations.


he had built the emerald city, and it twinkled whenever bare branches crossed it.


there were hula girls, strawberries, flamingos, palm trees... even betty boop! (i promise that last one is betty boop, just squint a little).




i wanted to take pictures of everything with my dinky little camera phone, but it was freezing, so i'll leave the lobsters, tool set, snowmen, and the million other little lights to your imagination...


thanks george banton!

love,
j

05 January 2010

94

if(touched by love's own secret)we, like homing
through welcoming sweet miracles of air
(and joyfully all truths of wing resuming)
selves, into infinite tomorrow steer

--souls under whom flew(mountain valley forest)
a million wheres which never may become
one(wholly strange;familiar wholly)dearest
more than reality of more than dream--

how should contented fools of fact envision
the mystery of freedom?yet,among
their loud exactitudes of imprecision,
you'll(silently alighting)and i'll sing

while at us very deafly a most stares
colossal hoax of clocks and calendars.

(e.e. cummings)


love,
j

04 January 2010

public market


oh, seattle, why won't you just snow, already?

even so, on listless, windblown days like today i feel moved simply by the grumbling clouds and drizzle. found this picture in the seattle times (thanks!) this morning, then walked my folks' dog down by the lake and let the wind and rain kiss my frozen cheeks...

love,
j

03 January 2010

red poppy


i had the opportunity to meet tess gallagher a few years ago, and hear her read her poem, 'my unopened life' (which i always remember as, 'the spoon poem'). here is another of hers... touching on the beauty and fragility and sadness of life's inevitable end.


That linkage of warnings sent a tremor through June
as if to prepare October in the hardest apples.
One week in late July we held hands
through the bars of his hospital bed. Our sleep
made a canopy over us and it seemed I heard
its durable roaring in the companion sleep
of what must have been our Bedouin god, and now
when the poppy lets go I know it is to lay bare
his thickly seeded black coach
at the pinnacle of dying.

My shaggy ponies heard the shallow snapping of silk
but grazed on down the hillside, their prayer flags
tearing at the void-what we
stared into, its cool flux
of blue and white. How just shaking at flies
they sprinkled the air with the soft unconscious praise
of bells braided into their manes. My life

simplified to "for him" and his thinned like an injection
wearing off so the real gave way to
the more-than-real, each moment's carmine
abundance, furl of reddest petals
lifted from the stalk and no hint of the black
hussar's hat at the center. By then his breathing stopped
so gradually I had to brush lips to know
an ending. Tasting then that plush of scarlet
which is the last of warmth, kissless kiss
he would have given. Mine to extend a lover's right past its radius,
to give and also most needfully, my gallant hussar,
to bend and take.

love,
j

02 January 2010

"the generation of girls who can't even boil an egg"

that's the name of a real article, by the way. something simply must be done.

i have a love-hate relationship with eggs. i find them simultaneously delicious and revolting. sometimes they're runny, or chewy, which is just as awful, and then i can't stand them. i hate them cold. i am always anxious while cooking them. they just seem like a lot of a pressure.

but sometimes an egg is cooked perfectly. and then it's amazing. it's full of protein and good cholesterol (who knew such things existed?!) and a vibrant color that is so sure to start your morning in an excellent fashion. sometimes i get eggs fresh from linda, whose chickens are lovely and have feathers all over their feet like they belong in a haute couture runway show, and then i'm always excited. easter would be nothing without its exquisite painted treasures. deviled eggs are definitely a superior snack. and then, of course, there's my baking. my constant baking, which i am temporarily suspending. eggs are essential to all of it, holding the cake together, souffles, meringue... oh, when i am baking, i am speechless with my love for eggs.

because i am going on south beach (see my resolution #1), for the next two weeks i will be unable to appreciate eggs for their baking contributions. SO today, after a nice run in the rain, i decided to play nice and make some hardboiled eggs.


these are not my eggs. this is a picture of someone else's perfect hardboiled eggs. i didn't look up directions, because how hard can boiling an egg be? long story short, it's probably been 10 years since i made them, and i just sort of guessed on the timing (five minutes seemed like a nice round number). i cooked the whole dozen to a nice mediumboiled, much to my boyfriend's disgust who can, and i quote, "NOT eat a softboiled egg" (wuss). i, however, thought they were fantastic, with a firm outside and a nice warm delicious yellow inside. i already feel healthier!

and, as i may have indicated, i am filled with a newfound appreciation for the egg, which, when you think about it, is really a pretty beautiful thing, both as a symbol of life, and one of sustenance. next time they'll look like the picture. i hope.

love,
j

01 January 2010

morpho


(thanks, national geographic).

i hope you are all warm and safe and eating too much and loving your families. here's to a new year of joy and terrific adventures (skøl)!

love,
j